Thursday, July 30, 2009

On Solid, If Mushy, Ground

The crisis has passed...for now.

I called a crisis hotline when I got home from work. Talking to the woman really helped. And she remembered the earlier phone call from my husband. That made me feel good. Like someone actually cared about me enough to remember all that. She was very helpful to talk to. I never thought I'd be the person calling a hotline, but now that I have I'm glad they exist.

Both my husband and my mom think I should talk to my mother-in-law. I know she'd be totally understanding and she's probably really concerned about me. It's just, how do you bring that kind of thing up? It's not like "so now you know I'm crazy" is a great opening for dinner conversation.

The woman I talked to thinks I probably need to add some kind of anti-anxiety meds to my pharmacy. I had pretty much suspected that already. We'll see what the pdoc says on Monday. The good thing is that right now the weekend doesn't seem too long to wait. I can get through one more day of work. What's really gonna be crucial is getting to sleep. I haven't slept well in the past couple of nights, and I know that's affecting me.

I am utterly exhausted from my 24-hour long panic attack. Hopefully that means I'll be able to get a good night's sleep.

2 comments:

  1. I am glad the crisis line was there for you.
    Maybe to bring things up find some info online you can print out that is made for families, there are so sites out there made to help us give the info needed. Would be great if you could open up to your MIL.

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  2. Well done for recognising the need to reach out, and I'm so happy you were able to find support. I felt so much empathy for you reading the previous post, about whether you are "lazy" or a "drama queen" or whatnot. These are things I used to ask myself all the time, but truly, I believe in my diagnosis now and although knowing the cause doesn't fix things, having that perspective seems to help me. I hope your pdoc can tweak your meds and offer some advice on monday, meanwhile take care over the weekend (do some self-soothing as they say in DBT). Hugs to you Ari xx

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